After Narnia
by Loony123
Summary: After the events in Prince Caspian Susan returns to England feeling full of good memories of her adventures in Narnia. But slowly she begins to feel as if Narnia and Aslan have abandoned them in this world. Determined to begin to forget Narnia she begins to distance herself from her siblings. (last battle spoilers).
1. Chapter 1

Susan:

 _Grief can do terrible things but while it can tear you apart it can also do good as well. It was grief that helped me to remember. I don't think anyone has ever regretted anything as much as me. I made terrible mistakes in my life time and I want people to know about these mistakes so they don't follow in my footsteps. This is my story after Narnia:_

"Could you wear anymore make up?" Lucy asks. She looks at me in a different way than she used to. As though she is scared that I might explode at any moment.  
"Yes, I could actually," I reply coldly.  
"Don't snap at Lucy like that Su," Peter says angrily. I pull a face at him and turn my head away quickly.  
"I think she looks nice," Edmund says in my defence.

 _Edmund was always standing up for me. Whenever I came home after going out however late it was Edmund would always be "Just going to bed." I never really appreciated him looking out for me. I should have thanked him but instead I always replied coldly. I think he understood me. After all he had once been in my place. Narnia changed him like it changed me. But unlike me he's a better person now. He's not as selfish and he doesn't tell as many lies as he used to._

"Go away Edmund," I snap at him.  
"I was only trying to…" he starts defensively.  
"Well I don't need your help!" I say, before storming out the door, slamming it as loudly as I can behind me. I hear Edmund calling after me but I don't stop in till I am out of sight of the house. Then I break down sobbing. I love my family more than anything but I am breaking it apart. I try to act happy, to hide behind my makeup but the only way I can do that is by distancing myself from them. By distancing myself from them I feel I am distancing myself from Narnia and that's what I need. It is time to accept that I belong here. I was just getting used to that fact before I went back to Narnia and that's when I meet Caspian.

 _I was selfish and arrogant. Distancing myself from them didn't make me forget instead it made me remember more. My family was the barrier keeping the grief out but I let it in. None of the others made my mistake they confined in each other, talked about Narnia and it helped them. I thought that they were making a mistake by talking about it digging the wound deeper and deeper in knowing we could not return. I hated Aslan for doing this to me. Where was he in this world? He had abandoned us._ _There was war and death everywhere._

I stand there just out of sight of the house for almost half an hour cursing. Cursing my family. Cursing Aslan. Cursing Narnia. I hope it will make me forget but instead it makes me remember.

 **Caspian, I remember him so well the way his dark eyes sparkled in excitement before a battle. The way his lips felt when they touched mine. I loved him and I don't think I could ever love someone in the same way ever again. Time works differently in Narnia and I realise by know he could be married or really old or even dead.**

I come home at 3 o'clock in the morning. Edmund is there. " _Just going to bed"_ as normal. Mum gave up staying up for me every night a long time ago but I don't believe Edmund ever will. I enter my room that I share with Lucy and stumble around in the dark getting ready for bed so I don't wake her. Me and Lucy used to be so close and now that relationship has been broken and it's all my fault.


	2. Chapter 2

Peter:

"We need to talk about Susan," Ed says to me this morning. "Peter, I'm worried about her. She's changing. She's not who she was. She needs us."  
"Listen to me Ed," I say. "We can't make her choices for her. If she's trying to distance herself from us. If she's trying to forget. It's her choice."  
"Yes, but she's making all the wrong choices," Ed presses.  
"There's nothing I can do. Please, just accept it. I can't do anything. I'm not a king here."

 **I miss the old Susan. I truly do. I remember when we were all kings and Queens at Cair Paravel. Queen Susan the gentle. A brilliant archer and swimmer. The way she laughed and smiled. I miss that Susan but there is nothing I can do to stop her from changing. But I will always remember her for who she was.**

 _It was wrong of me to think like that I should have talked to her. Tried to make her see that she was doing the wrong thing. But instead I just stood back and watched the Susan I knew change. I know now I made the wrong decision and I have to put them right._

We are arranging a meet up. We were going to meet with the Old Professor Diggory and Aunt Polly, Cousin Eustace and his friend Jill. All of us who have ever been to Narnia to discuss our adventures. Susan won't come Edmund has asked her many times. But she just sticks out her chin and insists that Narnia doesn't exist. "What wonderful memories you have!" she says. "Fancy you still thinking about all those funny games we used to play when we were children." Ed believes she doesn't mean it but I'm beginning to think she really has forgotten about Narnia.

We are sat round a large table discussing our adventures in Narnia when suddenly he appears before us. A young Narnian king. He stares round the table I stand up and talk to him but before he can reply he disappears as suddenly as he appeared. Now I realise it is clear to us then that Narnia needs are help. We know it has to be Eustace and Jill who go to Narnia, as the rest of us are too old now, but how to we get them there. "The magic rings," Professor Kirke says suddenly. "The ones Polly and I used to get to Narnia for the first time."

Edmund and I are going to collect the rings we dress as workmen so that if anybody asked we would tell them we were looking at the drains. It's the only way we can get to Narnia even though Aslan told Professor Kirke and Polly to bury them so they couldn't be used again.


	3. Chapter 3

Lucy:

I get on the train with Polly and the professor to meet Eustace and Jill. Then we shall go to the station where Edmund and Peter will be waiting for us. Then Eustace and Jill will go to Narnia and find out how they need our help.

I hope we are not too late it was barely a week ago that the young King appeared to us but it could have been any amount of time from thirty seconds to a thousand years in Narnia. We stop at the station and Eustace and Jill get on to the train. The two of them come and sit down in our cabin. "To Narnia," Eustace exclaims happily. I envy them being able to go back to Narnia when I can't. But maybe I will make it back someday. We are almost at the station where we will meet Edmund and Peter. Jill looks out the window to try spot them on the platform. Suddenly the train swerves sharply. I jerk to the side and my head smashes against the window. Then everything blanks out.

Susan:

There are all dead every one of them. The train had crashed. Mum and Dad had been on the same train on their way up to Bristol and now I am the only one left. This is Narnia's fault. I hate it. It hurts so much to even think about them. For the last few months I was so horrible to them. It's all Aslan's fault making them all think they had to go on the some grand mission to save the world and now they're dead. I am in my bedroom for a whole week screaming, crying, kicking and cursing.

What's worse is that I almost changed my mind about Narnia. I was on my way to the platform to apologise and wish Jill and Eustace good luck in their mission. But then I heard about the crash.

 _It was then I remembered all the wonderful times I had in Narnia with them the adventures and the battles but I could never forgive Aslan for doing this to me for leaving me alone in the world. All of them were gone. The people I loved more than anything. I could never forgive him for tearing that away from me._


	4. Chapter 4

Edmund:

It feels so weird to think that barely half an hour ago me and Peter where on the platform waiting for the train to come. I still don't understand how all of this happened. One moment we were on the station platform and now we are here dressed like kings and queens in Narnia in front of a stable door. Eustace and Jill arrived through the stable door a few minutes ago and now the young Narnian prince we saw a few weeks ago is stood in front of us after being thrown through. Jill laughs. He looks up at her and his mouth falls open as he recognises Eustace and Jill in there finery. "Sire," says Jill, coming forward and curtsying politely. "Let me make you known to Peter, the high king over all kings in Narnia." The young prince steps forward and falls to his knees kissing Peters hand. For a moment I imagine that it is me in his position, High king over all Narnian kings, but then I stop myself this is no time for selfish thoughts. Peter raises him and kisses him on both cheeks before leading her over to Polly who is now younger and more beautiful than she ever was before. "Sir," Peter says. "This is that Lady Polly who came into Narnia on the first day, when Aslan made the trees grow and the beasts talk." Next Peter brings him to Professor Kirke, who like Polly is younger and more handsome than I have ever known him to be. "And this," He says, "is the lord Diggory who was with her on that day. And this is my brother, King Edmund: And this my sister Queen Lucy." When Peter mentions my name I bow politely to the young king.  
"Sire," says the king. "If I have read the chronicles right, there should be another. Has not your majesty two sisters? Where is Queen Susan?" The sound of Susan's name sends a chill down my spine. If we had all been brought here why had Susan not come too? After all she was still a Queen. Even if she was pretending Narnia didn't exist.  
Peter answers shortly and gravely: "My sister Susan is no longer a friend of Narnia."  
"Yes," says Eustace, "and whenever you've tried to get her to come and talk about Narnia or do anything about Narnia, she says 'what wonderful memories you have Fancy your still thinking about all those funny games we used to play when we were children.'"  
"Oh, Susan," says Jill. "She's interested in nothing these days except nylons and lipstick and inventions. She always was a jolly sight to keen on being grown-up."  
"Grown up indeed," says Polly. "I wish she _would_ grow up. She wasted all her school time wanting to be the age she is now, and she'll waste all the rest of her life trying to stay that age. Her whole idea is to race on to the silliest time of one's life as quick as she can and then stop there as long as she can."  
I purse my lips together and stay silent as they talk about Susan. Even if she is no longer a friend of Narnia. She is still my sister. I still love her and I can still forgive her. I look over at Peter and I can read the guilt in his face. He feels bad for not making more of an effort to talk to persuade Susan to come with us I can tell. "Well let's not talk about that now," He says, as if that will make his guilt go away. "Look, here are lovely fruit trees. Let us taste them."

Lucy:

We are all dead! It took us a while to process and realise that, but we know now. That is why we are here… This is Aslan's country!

Everyone ended up here, Tumnus, the beavers, Caspian, our friends from all our wonderful Narnian adventures. Aslans country is beautiful and I honestly don't believe there is anywhere else I would rather spend the rest of eternity than here.


	5. Chapter 5

Peter:

Aslan's country is the most beautiful place you have ever seen. The place you go when you die. But there is something missing; Susan. Edmund was right, we should have tried to help her, to make her see sense. But instead we just left her to forget.

It has been almost two years now. I miss her more than anything. I am standing watching Edmund and Lucy dancing and laughing together. They look happy and carefree but I know they are living with the same burden as I am. Wishing they had done something, anything to get the old Susan back.

 **The four of us stepped out into the snow blinking into the light after the dark and dusky wardrobe. There was a whole new world stretched out in front of us as far as you could see. I whole world covered in pale white snow. As I turned to Susan I could see the disbelief in her face. "Impossible," she whispered. Susan was so smart and logical she would never believe in anything unless someone shoved the evidence in her face. But here we were now staring at a land that wasn't possible there was no way something this large and this beautiful could fit into any normal wardrobe. I knew exactly what Susan was thinking when her face suddenly lit up in excitement this was a change she'd been waiting for something else to study and explore. To discover something that had never been discovered before.**

Susan changed so much she is no longer curious or interested in her studies. Instead, she is interested in makeup, lipsticks, parties and staying out late. But the old Susan is still there deep down.

It is time for me to talk to Aslan.


	6. Chapter 6

Edmund:

It's been two years since we arrived at Aslan's country. I love it here, everything is so beautiful. But however hard I try to enjoy it I can't get rid of the feeling that we betrayed Susan. I know what it feels like to be an outcast and she is more outcast than I ever was.

 **I couldn't believe that my siblings were believing all the rubbish that came out of the beaver's mouth. Who decided that the white witch was evil? She was nicer to me than any of my siblings had ever been. This great lion Aslan seemed to be a lot more dangerous than she anyway. I stood away from the rest of the group watching, observing, gathering information. Then when the time was right I could slip away into the night.**

Peter, Susan and Lucy were still there for me even though I had felt totally alone and had not realised the strength of their support. If it wasn't for them I am sure I would have died a long, long time ago. But it feels like we have abandoned Su completely leaving her alive and alone in the world without any belief in Narnia or Aslan or us. Sometimes, when I look at Peter and Lu it feels like they have almost forgotten her, like it always has just been the three of us. But it hasn't and somehow I have to find Su, to reassure that I hadn't forgotten her and that she had support. I know what it's like to feel like an outcast and I can't let Su be barred from Narnia forever. After all, once a King or Queen of Narnia, always a King or Queen of Narnia. Right?


	7. Chapter 7

Peter:

Aslan stands at the top of the cliff. You can see the whole of Aslan's country from their stretching for miles and below people continue, as if there life had never stopped, but now there is no war, no conflict, and no unhappiness. Instead just perfect bliss. Everyone seemed to move in perfect harmony. But there was something missing, and that was Su.

I can't help but feel nervous as I approach the massive creature stood in front of me. After all, Aslan may be a good lion but he is not a tame one. He turns as he hears me coming and I kneel before the fantastic beast.

"Rise son of Adam," Aslan commands, in his deep, powerful voice that no one has ever dared to refuse. I stand. "What is it that is troubling you?"  
"It's Su," I say. "I think she needs a second chance. If only I could talk to her. Try to make her see reason…" I stop then.  
Aslan continues to stare intently then replies, "Susan had abandoned Narnia… she lost faith in what was important and she must suffer the consequences… however, I believe that everyone deserves a second chance… tomorrow night either you or one of your siblings will have the chance to talk to her. It will be down to you to change her course of faith. Whomever you choose to perform this task must meet me here when the sun begins to set."  
"Thank you Aslan," I breathe, steadily I hurry down the hill to tell my siblings the news.


	8. Chapter 8

Edmund:

Peter has told us the news! He's done it. He talked to Aslan and now we have a chance, a chance to bring Susan back. I miss her more than anything else in the world and I know she deserves this, a chance to remember, to realise the mistake she has made. After all "traitors can mend, I knew one that did once."

 **She had turned all of them to stone. Every single one. They were just an innocent family on their picnic before suddenly the life was sucked from them deemed instead to spend the rest of eternity as a statue. It was then that I realised how wrong I had been. This thing stood in front of me was no human, she was a monster and I had to do everything I could to stop her, before the whole of Narnia was reduced to stone…**

"It has to be me…" I ague with Peter. "I know what it feels like to…"  
"No," Peter interrupts, "it should be me. It was my fault."  
"Peter…" Lucy tries to say but I interrupt her.  
"I understand her, I know what she's going through… I can help."  
"I'm her older brother, it should be my responsibility."  
"I…" Lucy starts, but I cut across her again.  
"You don't always have to play the hero Pete, we need to give Susan her best chance and I'm the only one who's been through something similar. I was a traitor, but I'm here now and I know I can help her do the same."  
"Will you two just listen to me for a second?" Lucy exclaims, a tone of command in her voice.  
We stop then. We both know that it is Lucy who understands Aslan and Narnia better than any of us. We've started to realise that when it comes down to decisions like this it's usually Lucy who has the right idea. Despite Peter's bravery, Susan's logic, my ambition. Lucy has the ability to understand things in a way that we never could.  
"It has to be me," Lucy says. Both Peter and I open our mouths to protest but Lucy continues before we have the chance. "I am the only one of us who has never lost faith in Aslan. Not even for a second. So, it should be me who talks to Susan. I can restore her belief."


	9. Chapter 9

Susan:

I kneel at their grave. The three of them were buried together, the way they way they would have wanted it. My hand traces over the names on the stone. _Peter Pevensie. Edmund Pevensie. Lucy Pevensie._ It hurts to say the names out load, but I do it anyway. Their names deserve to be heard, they deserve to be remembered. I haven't visited them since the funeral, I couldn't bring myself to do it, I needed time. Suddenly, I begin to sob. Softer at first, then louder and louder until I am screaming into the fog that surrounds the graves. It's now that I see her appearing from the mist like a ghost in a dream. She is there, even though my mind tells me that logically that's impossible. Lucy cannot exist anywhere she lies in the ground beneath my feet. But my senses tell me that she is there walking through the mist to me. My little sister!

"Lucy," I breathe. "You cannot be here. I must be imagining you." I close my eyes and count to ten but when I open them again she is still there. Standing next to me.  
"You look horrible Susan," she says, a flash of a smile passing across her face.  
She sits down beside me and pulls out her handkerchief from her pocket. I recognise it immediately as the one she gave to Mr Tumnus all those years ago. "Here," she says handing it to me. "You need it more than I do." I take it from her grasp and wipe my eyes slowly.  
Lucy turns to face the gravestone. Her face turns white as she realises where we are sat.  
"I forgot we must have a grave here," she says, her face pale with shock. "I… I never thought of that before."  
"Y-you ca-can't be here," I manage to stutter.  
"But I am here Susan. I am… I live in Aslan's country now, we all do. It's a real place and it's perfect. Everyone is there Tumnus, the beavers… Caspian."  
His name plays on her lips a little longer than the others. She knows how I feel about him. The reason why I could never really flirt with a guy for longer than a few days before I seemingly lost interest. It was because of him. However hard I tried I could never really stop loving him.  
"You could be there too. When you die." Lucy continues. "But you have to believe. Believe in Narnia, believe in Aslan, believe in me."  
"I can't Lucy," I whisper. "I'm sorry. I can't."  
But its then that all the memories come rushing back, heavy and quick…

 **Stepping through the wardrobe for the first time, tea at the beavers, the race to the stone table, Father Christmas, archery, Aslan, the battles, the excitement, our coronation, the lamppost, Caspian, Miraz, the white witch, the trees…. I remember it all…**

"I remember…" I exclaim. "I remember." I look up to see Lucy smiling at me but already she is fading. "Please don't leave me again," I cry.  
"Just hold on to the memories," she says. Before she disappears completely.  
"Lucy," I mouth into the mist, a single tear runs down my face, but this time everything feels different.  
I am ready.

Lucy:

I think I did it! Susan's face and her surroundings slowly start to disappear and our replaced with the vibrancy of Aslan's country. Slowly, my brothers' faces come swimming into view, anxiously awaiting my news. I watch them light up at the sight of my smile as I run towards them and we embrace.  
"I did all I could," I say. "And I think it worked. All we can do now is wait."


	10. Chapter 10

Edmund:

Sixty whole years have passed since then and still Susan has not arrived. It feels like no time has passed at all here. Time is different in Aslan's country. No one ever ages, instead you appear in Aslan's country to be as young or old as you would like to be and then you stay that way for the rest of eternity.

Although, we have been anxiously awaiting Susan's arrival for a while now we have not lost faith in her. We know she is out there somewhere still alive and well waiting for the right moment to join us here. I miss her still, more than I ever believed it possible to miss someone and I know that the others do to…. Lucy, Peter, Eustace, Jill, Professor Kirke and Polly, even Aslan… and Caspian.

When we first came to Aslan's country I thought it possible that Caspian had all but forgotten Susan. He showed no emotion when he was told of Susan's betrayal. It now becomes obvious to me that he was just masking the pain. For since Lucy told him of her expedition. He sits on the balcony of Aslan's country's Cair Paravel and watches the new spirits pour in and I know that he is silently searching every face. Hoping for the day when the gentle queen will appear among them. I know that truly he has never stopped loving her.


	11. Chapter 11

Lucy:

I walk slowly along the halls to the balcony. Caspian is there stood there as usual waiting for the flood of new souls to enter Aslan's country. I come and stand next to him. He doesn't look at me but he knows I am there, hoping as he is that today might be the day that Susan finally gets the fate that she deserves and joins us in Aslan's country.

"Sometimes I think that she might never come," Caspian says. "That I will wait here every day for so long that soon I shall forget what I am waiting for… whom I am waiting for."  
I say nothing in reply. Instead the two of us just stand in silence.

A few minutes has passed. I see them making their way over the hill. I begin to scan their faces, hoping that maybe this will be the day. Suddenly, I feel Caspian stand up slightly taller next to me.  
"Susan," he breathes.  
Then I see her, running towards Cair Paravel, her hair lose around her face, which has not an inch of make-up on it. Instead she looks younger, care free and every inch Queen Susan the gentle of the golden age. An excited laugh escapes my lips.  
"Peter! Edmund!" I shout, and the two of us run down the stairs to tell my brothers the good news and greet the gentle queen.


	12. Chapter 12

Susan:

I wake up to hear the sound of a river running beside me, a river that I know all too well.  
"Narnia," I say softly to myself. "I must still be dreaming."  
Slowly, I stretch my old, aching bones to find that they are no longer as stiff as they should be at my age. Instead they are young and soft. Turning over I find that I am not lying on my bed at all, which I am sure is where I went to sleep, instead I am lying on the soft grass.  
"Where am I?" I think out load and then suddenly it hits me. "Alan's country!"  
Sitting up I look around there are five other bodies sleeping on the ground, other spirits that have passed through to the next life, everyone is beginning to stir and awake as if from a dream like I did. I stand up and look down at myself. I am wearing a long satin dress that I recognise from the golden age in Narnia, so many years ago. I am young again. When everyone seems to have arisen from their sleep that's when I see him. Standing a few meters away… Aslan. And suddenly we all start to run towards him chasing him through the delights that is Aslan's country. And then I see it ahead of me, Cair Paravel and running out of its doors the four people I love more than anything else that this world could offer… Peter, Edmund, Lucy and… Caspian!

I run towards them and am quickly caught up in a large embrace with my sister and brothers. Caspian stands back a huge grin on his face. After my siblings break away I walk up to him.  
"Caspian," I breathe, reaching out to touch his cheek with the back of my hand.  
"Susan," he replies, and suddenly we are kissing his lips on mine softer at first then harder. And it feels great. His lips taste of Narnia; the grass, the river, the snow and the sun. Then I know I have reached home! My final home!

 _It's never too late for anyone to change! That is something that I think we have all learnt, or will learn at some point in our lives. We all make mistakes and all of them are forgivable as long as we turn ourselves around and admit to them. There's room for everyone in Aslan's country, but only if we make the right choices and changes to our lives to get their!_

The End


End file.
